Funny motivational speaker
Hangry at the husband. The drive-thru cashier at the take and bake pizza chain handed me a medium instead of the large pizza, and suddenly I was mad at Steve.
My husband, Steve, was once the president of several manufacturing companies where inventory control was crucial to his success. Sometimes, his desire for inventory control causes us to bump heads when we grocery shop or have dinner guests. I usually want more; he often wants less.
Regarding the pizza, I concluded that Steve had purposely changed my order. What follows is our text exchange.
Me: I should have ordered pizza myself. A medium isn’t big enough. We need the large I told you to order. Thanks for nothing.
Steve: I thought I ordered what you asked.
Me: You purposely ordered a smaller size for inventory control. Now there won’t be enough. Good job.
Steve: Did you see that I’ve already eaten?
Me: No.
I looked back at our texts.
He HAD mentioned already eating.
I HAD NOT asked him to order a LARGE pizza.
Steve hadn’t undermined my pizza ordering skills. Instead, I’d fallen into mind-reading. Mind reading is the cognitive distortion that causes us to jump to conclusions based on faulty interpretations of reality.
I could have taken time to remind myself that I couldn’t be sure of why Steve ordered a smaller pizza. Instead of mind reading, I could have asked Steve to clarify his thinking. I should have collected more information to move away from my irrational thoughts.
We all get stuck mind-reading or jumping to conclusions. If a typically chatty co-worker suddenly becomes withdrawn, you may decide she’s unhappy with you.
Next time you catch yourself mind-reading or jumping to conclusions, ask yourself,
“Do the facts support this conclusion?”
“What else could be happening here?”
“What information do I need to make an accurate conclusion?”
We are not psychic. Next time, you form a pessimistic conclusion, slow down your emotional impulsivity, and seek clarification to live mindfully.
BTW: We only ate half the pizza.
