Funny motivational speaker
I will admit that June to October 2019 was challenging for me.
My mom fell on the sidewalk, concussed, cracked her sternum, and broke four ribs. She stayed with us to heal and, after lots of tears and discussions, she agreed to sell her home of forty-four years and move into a senior apartment facility near us.
Once we sold her 4,000 sq foot home, we sorted through all the stuff (lots of stuff) she and Dad had collected over the years. Driving back and forth from Minnesota to South Dakota took lots of time and energy, and we became physically and mentally exhausted.
Also, Steve and I bought a new home and moved the week before we started moving Mom. Plus, my oldest daughter, Christine, announced her move to Washington state.
Everything happened in between flying from coast to coast to speak at twenty-three engagements.
I often felt tired and overwhelmed and started to make discouragement a habit because of my negative explanatory style.
I was falling into the 3 P’s of negative thinking Personalization, Permanence, and Pervasiveness.
Personalization: “I am unlucky; I always mess up.”
Thinking the problem is yourself, instead of considering other outside things that have caused it.
Example: Our house closing date ended up on the day I was speaking in California. Immediately I blamed myself, figuring I’d messed up the times. It turned out that the real estate office made a mistake.
Impersonal Turnabout: By realizing that outside factors caused a challenging situation, we reduce the blame and criticism we put on ourselves.
Pervasiveness: “Everything always goes wrong.”
Thinking a bad situation applies across all areas of your life, instead of only happening in one area.
Example: Mom’s movers didn’t show up. A delayed flight caused me to sleep overnight in the airport. Our new garage door got stuck.
Specific turnabout: When you think about life, most days, most things go well.
On most days, you eat breakfast, your car starts, and you get to work safely. Every day brings some form of challenge, but fortunately, most things, both big and small, go as planned.
Permanence: “This hard time will never end.” Thinking a lousy situation will last forever.
During the weeks sorting, throwing, packing, and unpacking, it was easy to get discouraged and feel like we would ever finish moving.
Impermanent Turnabout: Everything changes, heck, not even Velveeta Cheese lasts forever. When you remember that setbacks are temporary, you improve your ability to accept and adapt for the future.
Exercise: Change Your Perspective
- Pick a challenge you are experiencing now.
- Write out how you can think about the situation as Personal, Pervasive, and Permanent.
- Turnabout: write out how the experience could be impersonal, specific, and impermanent
